Message Boards

by **Phil Elmore** » Tue Jul 25, 2006 9:34 am

Ken,

Given all the threads on the topic, I have to ask the question directly in order that your reiteration of the answer might clear up the issue. Is your posting critical of Jeopardy meant to be humor, or do you think poorly of the show? It's that simple. I mean, one assumes you cashed the checks long ago...

by **gvonk** » Tue Jul 25, 2006 9:43 am

Mister Jennings- Do you or do you not advocate releasing angry bees on nationally-syndicated game shows? America is awaiting your honest treatment of this dire question.

You know, because a lot of people are allergic. I'd assume there'd be some lawsuits to deal with.

by **Ken Jennings** » Tue Jul 25, 2006 9:47 am

Watch out, he runs a self-defense magazine.

by **Rick, Recovering KJL** » Tue Jul 25, 2006 10:00 am

Let's be honest: is there any TV show that wouldn't be improved by the addition of angry bees? I for one would pay good money to see them used on those home-fixer-upper shows.

by **AtomicPunk77** » Tue Jul 25, 2006 10:05 am

Rick, Recovering KJL wrote:Let's be honest: is there any TV show that wouldn't be improved by the addition of angry bees? I for one would pay good money to see them used on those home-fixer-upper shows.

Or as a new "twist" on Survivor.

by **harpua** » Tue Jul 25, 2006 10:09 am

Rick, Recovering KJL wrote:Let's be honest: is there any TV show that wouldn't be improved by the addition of angry bees?

This could help Jeopardy gather steam in new markets too. Japanese TV, for example, loves the programming that is physically humiliating to adults. But on a helmet and sign up for a game show. Even if you've never been to Japan to see it for yourself, you can see proof on US TV. Don't you remember that Simpson's episode where American's favorite family was on a Japanese gameshow?

by **Rick, Recovering KJL** » Tue Jul 25, 2006 10:09 am

And let's not forget those Bachelor-type shows! You can tell a lot about a person from how they react when suddenly faced with a swarm of angry bees.

Okay, maybe not. But it would still be friggin' hilarious.

by **AtomicPunk77** » Tue Jul 25, 2006 10:14 am

Rick, Recovering KJL wrote:And let's not forget those Bachelor-type shows! You can tell a lot about a person from how they react when suddenly faced with a swarm of angry bees.

Okay, maybe not. But it would still be friggin' hilarious.

Heck, I'd actually start watching!

by **Windian** » Tue Jul 25, 2006 10:15 am

Rick, Recovering KJL wrote:Let's be honest: is there any TV show that wouldn't be improved by the addition of angry bees? I for one would pay good money to see them used on those home-fixer-upper shows.

angry bees on PBS would significantly improve ratings...

by **Rick, Recovering KJL** » Tue Jul 25, 2006 10:18 am

Windian wrote:
Rick, Recovering KJL wrote:Let's be honest: is there any TV show that wouldn't be improved by the addition of angry bees? I for one would pay good money to see them used on those home-fixer-upper shows.

angry bees on PBS would significantly improve ratings...

Oh man. I am so in for watching "The McLaughlin Group" with angry bees. How can we make this happen?

by **mere_bystander** » Tue Jul 25, 2006 10:56 am

Rick, Recovering KJL wrote:
Windian wrote:
Rick, Recovering KJL wrote:Let's be honest: is there any TV show that wouldn't be improved by the addition of angry bees? I for one would pay good money to see them used on those home-fixer-upper shows.

angry bees on PBS would significantly improve ratings...

Oh man. I am so in for watching "The McLaughlin Group" with angry bees. How can we make this happen?

ROFL!!! Yes! The McLaughlin Group would be much improved! :lol:

by **DadofTwins** » Wed Jul 26, 2006 12:51 pm

Rick, Recovering KJL wrote:
Windian wrote:
Rick, Recovering KJL wrote:Let's be honest: is there any TV show that wouldn't be improved by the addition of angry bees? I for one would pay good money to see them used on those home-fixer-upper shows.

angry bees on PBS would significantly improve ratings...

Oh man. I am so in for watching "The McLaughlin Group" with angry bees. How can we make this happen?

Simple: Clone Eleanor Clift.

by **WendellWit** » Thu Jul 27, 2006 9:17 pm

Other TV formats that would benefit from the addition of angry bees:

Lifetime Original Movies ("A man she once trusted is now a stalker with BEES")

Awards Shows (going too long with your acceptance speech? RELEASE THE BEES!)

Cooking Shows ("Bam!")

Saturday Night Live (hey, they probably still have the costumes from the John Belushi era)

Anything with Regis Philbin ("These bees are OUTA CONTROL!")

Poker Tournaments ("There's the flop... and the sting...")

With proper promotion, we might even see: "BEES ON A PLANE!"

by **IHeartTomatoes** » Fri Jul 28, 2006 7:56 am

Its hard living in a world where everyone gets their news through sound bytes.

I have to admit though, I probably never would have found this great site if it hadn't happened so my thanks to the funny bone removed press!

Perhaps we should all put disclaimers on our post warning that Humor is involved.

Bees bees, I've turned a few loose to clear out the few remaining guest that didn't realize the party was long over, but turning them loose on Regis Philbin... NOW that's funny!

by **Windian** » Fri Jul 28, 2006 8:15 am

WendellWit wrote:
With proper promotion, we might even see: "BEES ON A PLANE!"

This was amazing

by **VirgeZ** » Fri Jul 28, 2006 8:26 am

Do you have all the tin tin books? I do I love them . and I am SO GLAD to see I am not the only one on earth *besides in other countries* that likes/liked, reads/read them. The cartoons sucked a bit though, but the books are amazing. I owuld like a dictionary of captian haddocks words. would you write one up?
:!:

by **WendellWit** » Fri Jul 28, 2006 8:45 am

I was introduced to Tin Tin by the '60s cartoons, which I thought were great (maybe better than the comics, but that's for the Iconoclast discussion). Of course, something like "Captain Haddock's Insults" must be already on the web somewhere (and easily Google-able)...

This one claims to be the first one on the web - 1997

This one has them broken down by book and shows who he was insulting

The Wikipedia page on the subject is officially incomplete.

*********

BTW, I'd insist that "BEES ON A PLANE" get no worse than a PG13 rating. Maybe it could use some of Captain Haddock's language instead of Samuel A. Jackson's.

by **Ken Jennings** » Fri Jul 28, 2006 8:53 am

WendellWit wrote:BTW, I'd insist that "BEES ON A PLANE" get no worse than a PG13 rating. Maybe it could use some of Captain Haddock's language instead of Samuel A. Jackson's.

"I want these (Bashi-bazouk) bees off this (anthropophagus) plane!"

by **VirgeZ** » Fri Jul 28, 2006 8:55 am

YOu were most helpful I log tons of hours on line and dont have the energy to use google *shakes head* Cheers to other lazy net addicts.

I love tin tin and , thank you for the links.

by **WendellWit** » Fri Jul 28, 2006 8:58 am

You're very welcome, VirgeZ, and thank you, Ken for the phrase "Bashi-Bazouk Bees". I really must update my own blog.

by **bdiehm** » Fri Jul 28, 2006 12:16 pm

Phil Elmore wrote:Ken,

Given all the threads on the topic, I have to ask the question directly in order that your reiteration of the answer might clear up the issue. Is your posting critical of Jeopardy meant to be humor, or do you think poorly of the show? It's that simple. I mean, one assumes you cashed the checks long ago...

Hilarious -- unlike the original Jeopardy! posting of Ken's, I can't tell whether Mr. Elmore is being serious or if this is intended as humor ...

BTW, great Satchel Paige quote in the original piece, Ken!

by **JenLee** » Fri Jul 28, 2006 12:29 pm

While we're wreaking havoc with bees on television, could we point a swarm at Rachael "Love that Joker" Ray? That would really make my week.

by **WendellWit** » Fri Jul 28, 2006 1:24 pm

I aleady suggested Cooking Shows in general, but before I went with the obvious "Bam!" joke, I was thinking "Thirty Minute Meals or 300 Stings, Whichever Comes First".

by **bobg** » Fri Jul 28, 2006 1:55 pm

Good grief: I got a glimpse of one of the nastier comments last night before Ken took it down, and I gotta say, whether or not people can muster a sense of humor, the very least they can do is to mind their manners.

On the bright side, it inspired me to write the following: my bid to make the inevitable Ken Jennings biopic (I see Bruce Willis as Jennings) into a musical. I call this showstopper "March of the Easily Led."

--

Assume the worst!
Assume the worst!
First things first:
Assume the worst!

Is it possible he joked?
Never mind, 'cause I'm provoked

Assume the worst!

"I kid because I love"
Is not something I've heard of

Assume the worst!
Assume the worst!
It's for scandal that we thirst
Assume the worst!

[interlude]

My friend told me a rumor
It was some left-coast thing called humor
Does Ken expect us all to be brainiacs now?
In pop culture he's enshrined
For the motley in his mind
It's holy to me but he tipped the sacred cow

The world may be on fire
But the things that raise my ire
Are the ones that I can quickly comprehend
Global warming, Middle East
I can follow not the least
But mess with Jeopardy! and you mess with me, my friend

[spoken:]
And to think I thought I could leave all the thinking to thoughtless over here!

Assume the worst!
Assume the worst!
By the Post I've been coerced
Assume the worst!

Should we give him the doubt's benefit?
I just can't see the zen of it

Assume the worst!

Must leap to TV's defense
Into Ken I'll knock some sense

Assume the worst!

We thought that he was one of us
'Til he started making fun of us

Assume the worst!

He cashed the check
Then trashed Trebek
He won the prize
Now he cracks wise
A household name
Has he no shame?

His fame must be reversed!

Assume the worst!
Assume the worst!
Except when George Bush does it first...
Assume the worst!

--

Of course these are just lyrics. I would love it if someone played Loewe to my Lerner, Rodgers to my Hart, Rodgers to my Hammerstein, O'Sullivan to my Gilbert, and composed a melody for it.

Cheers,
- Bob

by **deborah** » Fri Jul 28, 2006 2:19 pm

bobg wrote:On the bright side, it inspired me to write the following: my bid to make the inevitable Ken Jennings biopic (I see Bruce Willis as Jennings) into a musical. I call this showstopper "March of the Easily Led."

I'm a composer . . . if you'll be the lyricist and I write the music, we can make this happen!

(Hello, I'm new here, by the way -- found the blog linked from a friend's livejournal post and was immediately hooked!)

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Mr. Jennings, A Direct Question

Mr. Jennings, A Direct Question

I have a direct question 2!

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Assume the worst

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